How can I know?
What you think and feel. What the „right“ decision is?
The ability to know what my counterpart is feeling and planning has been given to us through evolution. Our brain and our bodies form inner images, representations of what is happening emotionally or intentionally in our counterpart. This is how we „know“ what is going on.
We also have the ability to judge the probable correctness of decisions in advance. Our brain is uniquely capable of recognising and storing patterns in complex situations. New situations are judged on the basis of these patterns. In order for the comparison with our patterns to lead to good results, however, it is necessary that the wealth of experience we draw on is up-to-date.
Both skills, that of external perception and that of pattern recognition, can be trained. In the case of coaching training, they need to be trained.
To do this, I should not be afraid to be on a first-name basis with my own inner life, my body reactions and my past and present problems, to have self-awareness. I acquire self-awareness by paying attention and by participating in self-experience events in the form of courses, self-therapy or coaching.
Self-awareness as a two-way conversation or as a group event means that current or past life situations, mostly those that were perceived as problematic, are discussed again or scenically re-experienced. The thoughts and emotions that are released and the continuous feedback loops that are created in the process set in motion profound processes of experience and learning.
In this way, coaches can increase their certainty that their intuition, their gut feeling, gives them the right suggestions and that they are with their clients.
Above all, they can learn whether a feeling they perceive is the client’s or their own. You will know better if the problem that moves you is the client’s or your own. This skill is extremely important for the protection of the client.
Self experience is therefore a top priority in the trainings for which I am responsible. I also train methods through self-experinece, so that they become part of normal behaviour.